


Daggers and Apples

by confusednerdling



Category: Once Upon a Time (TV)
Genre: Dark Swan, F/F, F/M, Regina/Apples, Slight Rumbelle, Snowing Parenting, Takes Place After Season Four, alcohol use, swanqueen - Freeform
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-11-18
Updated: 2015-11-18
Packaged: 2018-05-02 05:19:52
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,892
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5235689
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/confusednerdling/pseuds/confusednerdling
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>After the Season Four Finale, Regina is sent in a state of shock as she deals with Emma Swan's sacrifice. In addition, she must deal with her feelings over Emma. Thus, causing her  to open her eyes regarding her relationship with Robin Hood</p>
            </blockquote>





	Daggers and Apples

**Author's Note:**

> This Fic is Swanqueen and shows how Regina deals with the new changes. (If you squint you can see Rumbelle, but honestly, there's only a single scene.) 
> 
> (It somewhat bashes Outlaw Queen and Captain Swan and shows those relationships ending with the recent changes. I do not oppose those ships but I am a Swanqueen supporter to the end!)

Regina could barely breathe. That right had been stolen when a girl – a blonde fool with bright green eyes like emeralds – had sacrificed herself for her after the shit Regina put her through.

She didn’t know what to do… The usual people – the “heroes” – were still assembled in a half circle facing a warped dagger that was engraved with a familiar name. That would have been Regina’s name on that blade if Emma hadn’t stepped in. It wasn’t like she wanted to become the Dark One, but she’d rather become something she hated than watch Emma go through it. The first to speak was Snow – Mary Margret. It wasn’t actual words. In fact, it resembled gibberish to be accurate. She exclaimed loudly a phrase and crumpled to her knees in a mess of tears. Charming – David wrapped his arms around her, rocking her gently like he would to their baby Neal.

“Emma…”Hook choked, clasping his only good hand around his mouth. “Is she…”

Everyone turned to Regina. They didn’t say, but they were blaming her. They were hating her. She could feel it in her blood. Even Robin her alleged “soulmate” looked at her differently. Regina backed away slowly in a panic and in seconds, found herself running towards the pawn shop. She slammed the red door open so much so the poor bell almost break by her force.

“GOLD!” Regina shrieked. “WHERE IS HE?”

Belle was weeping softly, but gathered some composure to create an articulate response. “He’s in…He’s in some sort of coma. He’s with Dr. Whale… A magic coma? I think that’s what he said. I have to admit I wasn’t – “

Regina cut her off with a flick of the wrist with eyes squinted and a sneer in place. “I’ll just have to – “

“No, Regina!” Bella cried out, throwing her arms in the air in an act of surrender. Fool. Regina would have sent a fireball hurdling at her chest, but decided not to. That damn goodness kicking in. “No magic! He’ll come out of it when he’s ready!”

After that, life got blurry. Robin took residence in Regina’s mansion alongside Henry who was in denial of the whole thing, Gold never seemed to get better in the days to pass, and the Charmings were determined to free their daughter of the darkness, but Regina was the only one who was willing to devote her entire existence to solving the case, willing to do anything needed.

\---

 

Mary Margaret woke with a start. It had been a week since Emma turned to the elusive Dark One and the world of Storybrooke was robbed of the often sarcastic and heroic Savior, but she was more than that to Mary Margaret. Emma was her daughter and they carried a bond that was stronger than friendship. Family.

“It’s five in the morning,” David complained, pulling the blankets over his head as Mary Margaret moved to the far side of the loft where the kitchen section began and ended.

She flipped a switch and watched as the loft spread with bright lights.“Sorry, sweetie. Go back to bed,”

David scrunched his face up yet obeyed. Thankfully, her husband slept soundly. Mary Margaret moved to the window, watching the still Storybrooke the way she did every morning since Emma’s disappearance. Her daughter could be casually walking down Main Street or on the beach or perhaps the woods, but there was always a chance Emma would head to the loft when she regained her strength so Mary Margaret waited. And at exactly five thirty o’clock, a familiar figure ran by.

It was Regina Mills. Regina Mills was the type to have a perfect body without any effort; however, the once Evil Queen had taken up jogging early in the morning since Emma poofed. And right on schedule, Regina stopped and stared at the dead street – the absence of car roaring, the pitter patter of people gone, and everything replaced with the echoes of nature. And Mary Margret’s friend just broke.

It was hard to see at first, but it was there. She would jog, freeze, ponder, and shatter into a million pieces like one of her mirrors. After half a second passed, she’d regain her composure and push on. Regina was good at that. She was good at enduring. She had been for years. This time was different. She moved towards the loft, walking weakly from her run. The Queen wasn’t exactly athletic despite her stunningly, fit body.

Mary moved to the door. She waited for a minute or two before she opened, and when she did, Regina stood behind the door. She was wearing a black hoodie and red leggings with her hazel eyes swimming in tears.

“I’m sorry,” she croaked. She wasn’t apologizing for the out-of-character outfit or the tears. She was apologizing for Emma.

“It’s not your – “

“It is,” Regina sniffled. “I did this to your daughter,” She pushed a wooden box in Mary Margaret's hand forcefully. “This…This shouldn’t be in my possession. I’m…I’m a monster,”

Mary opened her mouth to argue, to protest this statement, to insist it wasn’t true, but Regina put on a watery smile. “It’s fine,” she told her. “I’m Rumpelstiltskin’s monster and no matter how many times I swat at the leach, it’s still there. I still have a collar on my neck and so will Miss Swan. The darkness... It'll tug at her. It'll claim her.... It’s my fault,”

Mary Margaret's hands moved to the box and when she opened it, Regina had disappeared. There was dagger in it. One that read Emma Swan. And like every morning, Mary Margaret let out a loud sob and drowned her sorrows in freshly brewed coffee instead of waking her husband.

\---

 

Regina pulled herself out of bed. It was hard at first, because her legs killed from her new hobby. Robin was downstairs making coffee and cutting up apples to feed Regina’s addiction to the fruit. She walked down with the same, fake smile plastered on her face as she grabbed an apple slice and ate hungrily.

“You weren’t there when I woke up this morning,” Robin spoke up first. He didn’t seem worried despite this comment. He never did. 

"Went on a jog,” Regina remarked, making sure to sound casual and not like a person who hadn’t slept in an entire week. She hesitated for a second as she heard marching of two boys running down the stairs. Roland poked his head in first, giving both adults a hug, and going straight for the cereal.

Henry moved slowly, unlike the toddler, but with a purpose. “Morning, mom,” he gave her a quick kiss on the head. Regina gave him a tight hug. When they parted, she threw him an apple as he headed out there. Already, he was a few minutes behind schedule.

“Have a good day, Henry!” Regina shouted after him. “Watch Roland!”

She watched as the small child waddled after her son. Kindergarten was starting up which meant both children were in school. This should give the “happy” couple some time alone, but Robin always had to dash to the woods to work with Merry Men on the newest mission. This time it was to find Emma.

“You going to be okay?” he asked in the sweetest voice possible, grabbing her shoulders and squeezing possessively.

“Yeah,” Regina lied her heart out. “I’m just going to take a shower like I do – “

“Every morning?” Robin finished for. He paused but nodded. “Love you,”

Regina mumbled it back before she ran up the stairs and moved the white tile bathroom. Her sweaty clothes fell to the floor and her hand spun the dial as the boiling hot water poured from shower head. She waited for a second and took a step forward. The water smacked against her flesh turning it a fiery red and the pain felt horrible but good at the same time. She took a deep breath and turned the dial to the left, making the water colder, and let the water beads roll over her face and dark hair. And that’s when the tears came. They usually came slowly, but with the separation of the dagger still a fresh wound, Regina couldn’t help but blubber endlessly as the water washed away the tears and drowned out the noise. She couldn’t let anyone know she wasn’t the same queen. She couldn’t let anyone figure out she was just as broken as everyone else or maybe more so. She had to be confident. She had to beautiful. She had to be strong. Emma always was.

She stepped out of the shower and admired her bare flesh, admiring the scars from battle, the wrinkles from worry, because it all marked her time on this Earth. She grabbed the closest towel and wrapped it around her. From the bathroom, she moved to the bedroom where she put on a black blazer, grey pencil skirt, and a blouse – dark colors to match her mood.

Regina Mills moved from her house to the Mayor’s Office. It was also known as a second home as work was important to her. She was certainly determined to have it all.

Mary Margret was waiting by the door with a frantic look on her face. “Regina!” she called out, stretching out her hand to grab the mayor’s shoulder and pull her closer. “There’s something you have to see down at the sheriff’s office!”

“I’m the mayor. Not the sheriff,” she snapped. “If you have an issue, ask your charming husband,” She pulled away and marched into her office, sitting at her rightful place – behind the desk on her black swivel chair.

Mary Margaret followed her in. She scratched the top of her head, her normally tidy pixie cut do a mess. “We need you down at the sheriff’s office,” Mary Margaret repeated, slamming her hand down on the desk. “It’s… It’s Emma!”

Regina’s eyes widened and she nodded, chasing after the woman like she had done so many times in her life before.

\---

 

“Miss me?” The words were cold and strange coming from the woman who stood in front of her parents, a drunk pirate, and Regina.

“Em-ma,” the brunette murmured in disbelief, running her fingers through her hair. She had been dreaming about the face that looked at her now, but wondered why her eyes looked so distant when they were right in front of her. She swallowed, trying to gain courage to say something else, but all her words had been stolen by astonishment.

“Finally speechless, Your Majesty? Disappointing. I was expecting a sassy one-liner right about now,” Emma snickered, crossing her arms tightly. Her appearance wasn’t the only thing that changed – dark leather tightly encasing her body, hair that was platinum blonde, lips redder than apples and leather jackets…

“Emma, why…why are you here?” It was Mary Margaret who spoke. Her hands were trembling at her side. Whether from the caffeine, the exhaustion, or the anxiousness that bubbled through her, it was unclear, but Emma noticed immediately.

Instead of offering some assurance, she just smiled maliciously as if it was answer enough. "Just to visit,” Emma shrugged.

Hook took a step forward, hiding the flask in his leather jacket, but he could not help revealing how drunk he was as he slurred, “Love, gotta say… You look hot,”

“Shut it, pirate!” Regina snapped viciously. Her eyes returned to Emma with hesitation and nervousness that had not been there a while ago. “I-I-I mean, it’s not that you aren’t…um,hot that is… I just…” She clenched her jaw shut and whipped her head to face Hook, targeting her frustration at him. “What are you even doing here?!”

“I’m the boyfriend,” he shrugged.

David balled up his fists, but said nothing, suppressing his rage. It took a moment as the anger in the station settled to a silent tension that suffocated them all.

Hook glanced wearily at the assortment of concerned and frustrated faces and shrugged again. Knowing that he wasn’t wanted, he stumbled out of the room.

Good riddance, Regina thought to herself. “You could do so much better,” Regina grumbled and she froze realizing she had spoken her thoughts out loud. She mentally scolded herself. Once upon a time ago, she was able to hold every thought down but nowadays it felt like her emotions were pounding and cracking the walls she had carefully built. It was all Emma’s fault. Regina made sure to keep the scowl on her face intact. She didn’t want the other woman to notice the newly corrupting weakness.

“Oh, I know,” the blonde said suggestively, scanning Regina up and down. “But honestly, I could say the same to you. Robin Hood, really?”

“He’s my soulmate!”

“Do you really believe that, Regina?! Believe you’re destined to be with him?! Of all people?! Of all the goddamn people, you end up with the thief and his drama?!” Emma stood up, shouting. She tensed realizing her parents’ immediate discomfort.

Mary Margret cleared her throat loudly and gave Regina a small nod as she said softly, “We’ll, uh, give you some…space,” David, who remained nonplussed, mimicked his wife’s reaction and left the room without a word.

The door slammed shut and Regina glared at Emma, but immediately her expression softened. Her anger dissipated.

“What happened, Emma?” she said softly.

Emma rolled her eyes. “I’m not broken,”

“Never said you were,” Regina cringed at how pathetically soft her voice was. Whatever remnants of the Evil Queen that once hid behind her normally stoic expression had evaporated recently.

“But you’re looking at me like I am!” Emma roared, slamming her fist against the table. Silence ensued. Both women consumed in thought – Regina thinking about warped daggers and leather and Emma of apple trees and pantsuits and sassy comebacks.

“You’re not broken,” the brunette spoke calmly, gaining composure. “B-But, you are hurt. Let me help you. I know what it’s – “

“You don’t know anything, Regina!” the other woman countered and with a scoff she added, “If I needed tips on how to pull off a sleeping spell or tips on how to make a lasagna, I’ll ask you,” Regina couldn’t help but blush.

“I know what it’s like to be stuck in a…cycle of hurting the people you love,”

“Really?” Emma frowned slightly.

“Do you not recall, Emma, our first exchanges? Henry? My mother? My father? You?” The last word fell out without her permission. She bit her teeth into her lips, punishing herself, and she felt a hand grab hers.

"You never hurt me,”

At first, Regina thought she had imagined the voice. It was so delicate. It was so different than the new Dark One’s tone that was pugnacious and cold. But then she heard the voice again and felt warmth spread through her body as the pale hand squeezed her own.

“You never hurt me, Regina,” The former Queen opened her eyes hesitantly and found a smirk and humor-filled green eyes staring at her. “I mean, sure, you were a pain in the ass, but you never hurt me. Or Henry for that matter. He loves you,”

Regina tightened her grip on Emma’s hand, afraid of letting go, but Emma made no move to prevent this moment from occurring.

“Henry love you too. In fact, right now, he misses you. A lot,” A watery smile spread across her face. “I happen to miss you too, Miss Swan,”

Emma studied her for a moment as if she was looking for an ulterior motive or perhaps some flaw in a trap Regina had concocted, but she did not find one.

“Regina?”

“Emma?”

“Um, I’d like…I’d like some tips on how to make a lasagna,”

Regina laughed like she hadn’t in a long time. “I would love to teach you. Tonight?”

Emma nodded vigorously and her eyes sparked with innocence that had not been in there before. “Will I get to see Henry?”

“Of course, he’s our son,” Regina tilted her head to the left, trying to memorize this foreign glint in the Dark One’s eyes, but she wasn’t the Dark One. She was Emma and she was always going to Emma. Regina took comfort in this fact. “Besides,” she added hastily. “We’re going to need some help in the kitchen,”

They paused for a moment. Both looking at each other like it would be the last time, but they still had tonight. Emma glanced at her feet, looking more like a nervous puppy than a powerful Dark One. “Will you, uh, get rid of Robin?”

Regina laughed again. “He smells like forest,”

“He does, doesn’t he?” And the two laughed loudly unaware that Mary Margaret and David were watching from the crack in the doorway.

Mary Margaret turned to her husband who watched dumbfounded at this exchange. He had always been oblivious to Emma’s relations with the Queen, but Mary Margaret knew Regina well enough to pick up on the hints between the two. Between the lovesick stares, the brief, fleeting smiles, and the son they shared and adored, she figured her husband would have caught on.

“They look…happy,”

“I know,” Mary Margaret grabbed her husband’s shoulder and sighed blissfully. “I think things are going to be better now,”

Her husband turned to her, planting a kiss on her forehead. “I think so too,”


End file.
